Everyone Needs a Village.
Shareables: The healing power of villages, summer reading, and an invitation to my fellow writers.
I have a cherished friend enduring an unexpected health crisis.
It’s been a prolonged ordeal just to get to a complete diagnosis. Then surgery, and soon, treatment. From the moment she first shared this news, she was astounded by the generosity of what she calls, her “Village.” A tribe of friends who’ve been showering her with love, well-wishes, and small acts of kindness. She joked with me recently that she’s been eating a lot of delicious home-made soup lately.
“Yup,” I said. “When you don’t know how to help, you make soup.”
Last weekend a couple of her villagers suggested she join us on a mini getaway. When we first proposed it to her, she said no. She had just received some discouraging news from her doctor and all she wanted to do was curl up in the fetal position and cocoon. We understood. We didn’t press.
But later that day, after a gentle nudge from another member of her village, she changed her mind.
We drove her to our friend’s cottage a little over an hour outside the city. No plan, just a couple of coolers stuffed with good food (yes, soup) and our overnight bags.
We talked openly about her illness, but we didn’t dwell there. We shared stories. We walked in nature. We planned a trip together. We were even given a tutorial on how to make cappuccino in the most elaborate, scary-looking contraption I’ve ever seen. (We were terrified we’d break it!)
We laughed. A lot.
Before dinner, our host proposed that she “whip up” some fresh biscuits. “It’ll take less than 10 minutes to put them in the oven,” she claimed. We called bullshit and took out a stop watch.
“Game on,” she said.
She was right, 7 minutes and 32 seconds!
We also cried a little.
I noticed my eyes spontaneously filled with tears from time to time. Not grief, but gratitude. For my beloved friend, and for her wonderful village that seemed to be holding us all up.
My friend’s village didn’t just happen.
She cultivated it with care and tending to intimate relationships. It grew from the hundreds of kindnesses she has shown to her villagers over the years. We feel blessed and grateful to be a part of it.
I’m not always good at tending my villages, those treasured clusters of intimates I have collected in my personal and professional life. I get caught up in the stuff of life – the long list of tasks to complete; the imaginary deadlines to meet. While I (mostly) say yes to invitations to connect, I rarely initiate. Instead, I spend hours squirrelled away in my writing perch. I forget that even though writing is a solitary pursuit, it still needs a village. I still need my peeps.
I’m declaring today, Village Day, to celebrate our beloved villages in all the forms they take. In honour of Village Day, I am sharing the work of three writers and friends from my local community who have recently joined Substack.
Gingerbread Guts by Kelly Hennessey
A little over 10 years ago, Kelly Hennessey, novelist Gina N. Brown, and I formed a tiny writers’ group, affectionately called Word Salad.
We’ve been urging Kelly to share her memoir, Gingerbread Guts, for some time now, and so we were thrilled when she launched it on Substack in late April. Gingerbread Guts tells her remarkable story of confronting cancer in her forties, as a mom of three, whose career was getting traction after putting it on pause to raise her little ones. It is told with heart, humour, honesty, and yes, guts. Her story unfolds in gripping, short, (under 5 minutes) vignettes that she publishes twice a week.
For an overview, watch this 15-minute video, from her appearance in the 2024 Halifax Story Slam event.
Earth School Field Notes by Karn Nichols
Karn Nichols is a kindred spirit and long-time colleague and friend. I was delighted recently to discover her here on Substack. Karn is a walking embodiment of the phrase “student of life,” and Earth School Fieldnotes is her study hall. Brimming with insight and wisdom, her essays are beautiful in their depth, honesty, and humility. You don’t learn from Karn, you learn with her, and that’s what makes Earth School worth reading.
How Can This Be Easy? by Krista Smith
In the fall of 2021, I was trying to transition out of a 20-year coaching and leadership development business and into a life as an online writer. I was intimidated, overwhelmed, and stuck. Enter Krista Smith. Her first words to me were, (no kidding), “We can make this easy.”
And we (she) did!
This March, Krista brought her wealth of experience and her extensive library of practical guidance to Substack. In her words, How Can This Be Easy “is where we talk about the mindset, the tech, & strategy required to turn your decades of experience into real revenue online.”
If you’ve been publishing online, are feeling discouraged and wondering if anybody’s out there, “The Grocery Store Truth Nobody Talks About…” is a truth you need to hear.
Shout outs!
The very best thing about publishing on Substack is its village vibe. It has introduced me to a wonderful community of writers who not only publish here, but who generously support and encourage each other.
I want to thank the growing village of fellow Substack writers who have supported and recommended me to their readers over the last few years.
Special thanks to Jenn Woltjen, Robin Blackburn McBride, Lou Blaser, Stephanie Pollock, Dr. Kelly Flanagan, Marika Páez Wiesen, Dr. Bronce Rice and Chantel Grant. I hope you all see and take advantage of my invitation below.
Please consider adding each and every one of these writers to your summer reading list.
It’s summer play time!
It’s that time of year when I take my annual summer break.
To my subscribers, whether you like, comment, or simply give a passing nod to me in your inbox, thank you for being here and watch for my return to your inbox this fall.
And to my incredible village of paid subscribers who support me and my work with your hard earned dollars, I see every one of you, and am so grateful for you and your generosity.
An invitation to the Substack Village
If you are a Slow Sip subscriber and you have written something you believe your fellow villagers might like to read, please tell us a little about it and share a link in the comments below.
Cathy! Thank you so much for this lovely gift. Can you believe it’s already been 5 years since we built that website? Being a part of The Slow Sip since the beginning has been a huge privilege. I’m delighted to find so many amazing writers on this platform and learn so much 🩷
Wow....In this article, you have clarified a very subtle nuance for me that I have been working with in my own life. Besides stating the obvious for me, that I have privileged survival through work over just about everything else - you very simply drew out the quality over quantity and what it means to really BE somewhere and to BE with someone.